Preserving Memories of My Dear Father

Sifting through a box of pictures I found a few that best depicted my dad in honor of his 92nd birthday today. He simply was a provider, encourager and loving father.

A picture he took of their backyard in 1970. He was a hard worker and loved working in his yard and took pride in it. He also enjoyed taking pictures and often tried different angles.

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Dad bowling at Stardust in Hammond, Indiana wearing his typical attire in 1996. Dad and Mom both enjoyed bowling and often had the grandkids bowling with them.

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Dad at the kitchen table eating lunch and watching TV with a grandson while Mom is at her traditional location at the kitchen sink in 1997. This is another traditional picture that each of my dad’s grandchildren can place himself or herself in as they remember sitting at the table eating with Papa. It also shows the cabinets that he refinished and the light over the kitchen table that he installed. On the counter is the coffee pot and food processor that my mother used daily.

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Mom and Dad at Indiana Dunes in 1998 with Dad taping his grandkids on the beach with his video camera. They frequented the Dunes in every season warm or cold. They loved hiking and enjoyed the tranquility of nature.

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Dad in their basement blowing at the candles on his 76th birthday cakes. This picture is a true depiction of what was constant in their life. Mom by his side as usual. Dad’s pen in his pocket. And the traditional style that Mom always used when hosting her family dinners: a white table covering unrolled and cut for the long tables, the traditional white paper plates for cake and the same clear glasses that she always filled with ice for pop.

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Dad has physically been gone from us for eleven years but memories flood my heart with the pictures and cherished memories that we have. And with recording these memories for others to read after we are long gone, he will be known for future generations.

What memories of your dad or mom come to mind when you think of them on his or her birthday? Grab a paper and pen or open up your laptop and start Keeping Your Memories of your father or mother.

  • What is your favorite childhood memory of your dad or mom?
  • What is the best advice you got from your dad or mom?
  • What do you remember most about your dad or mom’s appearance?
  • What pleasant smells do you associate with dad or mom?
  • What sounds do you associate with your dad or mom?

http://www.keepingyourmemories.com

 

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Jake (My Dad) The Tool Man

My husband and I went to a large-scale hardware store today to purchase an electric sander that we need so we can 2017-04-29 Dad and Nancy
repair a door on our garden shed and restore some kitchen furniture. When walking in this store, we stopped and took a wide-angle view of the store to see what direction we needed to go. When I saw a sales clerk, I walked up to him to ask where to find the sander. He pointed out to us where to go and once there we stared at the numerous sanders and tried to figure out which one we needed. After consulting a son-in-law who does more construction work than we do, we settled on the palm sander.

With today, April 29, being my father’s 91st birthday what better place for me to be but at a hardware store.  Dad has been gone for over ten years now. If he had been here, we would have called him to borrow one of his sanders. He seemed to be a tool collector, and he knew how to use everything and used it at least once. However, if he didn’t have what we needed, he would have met with us to help us.

Today also reminds me of the multiple times in my childhood in the 1960’s when I tagged along with Dad to the local hardware store in our town. Lindy’s Hardware on Kennedy Avenue in Hessville was his mainstay for purchasing supplies and tools when he was making something or doing home repairs.

Lindy's Ace Hardware in Hessville

The difference between the large-scale hardware store and this small corner hardware store was you never had to search for something on your own. At Lindy’s the men who worked there along with the owner, Lindy, would stand at the front door and greet the customers (often by name) as they came in, ask what they were looking for, and assist the customer in finding the minutest item to the largest item that he or she needed. They were always nice to me when I walked in with Dad. I loved the awesome smell of that store that this hardware store carried. I can’t quite describe it other than freshly cut wood. But I will never forget the smell of that store.

Dad had a workroom in the basement where he built shelves and hung pegboards to organize all of his tools, nails, screws and nuts and bolts and a place to use his table saw. He spent much of his retirement time building wood creations and teaching his grandchildren how to do the same. My children loved exploring and working in Papa’s workroom.

Today in memory of my father on his birthday we are not having cake. We are sanding furniture! He would be proud of us!

If your father or mother is gone, what special memories come to you on their birthday? Now is the time to open up your laptop or grab paper and pen and use the questions below to start Keeping Your Memories of what special memories you have of them. You can start with answering these questions:

  • What special ordinary place do you remember going to often with your mom or dad?
  • What kind of smell did it have? Can you still remember that smell?
  • How often did you get to go on a one-on-one errand with your mom and dad?
  • Was it special because you had multiple siblings and enjoyed having your mom or dad to yourself?
  • What is the recollection of the location?

http://www.keepingyourmemories.com

Happy Valentine’s Day

2017-02-14

Every Valentine’s Day I think of my father. He has been gone for ten years now, but I still remember the greeting cards that he gave to me every year on Valentine’s Day. Those cards are all glued into my old scrapbooks. I cherish those cards.

On this 10th anniversary of his passing, I felt a trace of his spirit with me. On my train ride home tonight from work I passed by a woman in a seat holding three red long stemmed roses wrapped in plastic wrap. Memories immediately filled my heart of my dad’s tradition of giving my mother the same three long stemmed roses. Exactly what I saw this woman holding.

My parents always said those three roses represented my mom, my dad and God. If there are red roses in heaven, I know Dad will be giving them to her. I love you Mom and Dad!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

My Dad – Forever He Will Be

2014-06-15

Today on Father’s Day memories of Dad flood my heart and soul:

I remember Dad as a gentle, patient man. By example he quietly taught me life skills. He taught me to have good character and work ethics. I watched him work responsibly and diligently in taking care of his home and property. I watched him rise early in the morning to get to work on time. I admired him for his patience and tolerance.

When I was a little girl, Dad worked long hours as a freight conductor on the Pennsylvania Railroad. I don’t remember him being home, but I never thought of him not being home. It was just that Dad worked and that was life.

Dad would send us across the street to DeLock’s, a small corner grocery store, to purchase the afternoon newspaper for him but did not always ask for the change back from the

Dad gave me the necklace that I wore in my kindergarten picture. He also gave me a little yellow ring with flowers printed on it which I wore every day in kindergarten. Every year he gave me a Valentine’s Day card and gift. I still have all the cards he gave me.

Dad was a handy man. He could fix anything. He would work on his cars. He would work on the yard. Anything that needed to be fixed, he could do it.

Instead of sending me to school for drivers ed, Dad taught me how to drive when I was sixteen years old. He was a patient man. Behind our house we had a field with an alley that circled it. He had me drive back there until I got used to the feel of driving. Then he took me out on the streets to drive.

Fortunately, he was a quiet person and didn’t anger easily. For the number of his cars that I, and some siblings, damaged he never yelled at us.

Dad always changed the oil in his car himself and when I was a teenager, I asked him to teach me to do the same. He was willing to show me, however, I did not have to change it often as he did it for me.

I remember Dad at the Indiana Dunes racing up and down the steep sand dunes faster than us.

Dad passed in February 2007 making this my tenth Father’s Day without him. He’s physically gone but my memories of him keeps him close to me

Preserving the legacies of your father will prevent him from ever being forgotten and future descendants will be able to read his life story and understand their family heritage. Grab your laptop or paper and pen and start Keeping Your Memories of your father starting with the following questions:

  • In what ways are you like your father? And not like your father?
  • What did you enjoy doing with your father?
  • What was your proudest moment of your father?
  • What was the most valuable lesson you learned from your father?
  • What is the one thing you most want people to remember about your father?

www.keepingyourmemories.com

 

Home Sweet Home

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Growing up in the 1960’s in this industrial area of Northwest Indiana we were accustomed to living in the smaller homes that were built within close proximity to neighbors. The busy stay-at-home moms and hardworking dads worked daily on the upkeep of these homes along with their children who were assigned weekly indoor and outdoor chores to help maintain their homes.

Being from the generation of baby boomers it was not unusual for families in our area to have large families ranging from two to twelve children while the majority of families that I knew had at least five children. In these small homes multiple siblings shared bedrooms and one bathroom. It was a matter of taking turns or squabbling over who was in line next to use the bathroom.

The gray home – my home – had four bedrooms, one and a half baths, mom and dad, four brothers, one sister and two dogs. The white house – my best friend’s house where I spent many days and nights – had four bedrooms, two baths, mom and dad, four brothers, three sisters and one dog.

We often reminisce how back in those days after our chores were completed, we were not kept inside the house but expected to go outside. Reflecting on it I imagine it was for the sanity of the stay at home moms to have some peace and quiet!

We were sent outside and told to be back home in time for lunch. In the afternoon we met up with our friends again and rode our bikes, jumped rope, played Hopscotch, Hide and Seek or Simon Says. My brothers and their friends often knew where to meet up to play sandlot baseball or football.

We always knew when to come back home for dinner. And in the summertime we were back outside again until dusk catching fireflies and playing Ding Dong Ditch or Kick the Can.

Even though the home I grew up in was small, the good memories created there were immeasurable. What do you remember about your childhood home? Pull out your laptop or grab paper and pen and start Keeping Your Memories of the home or homes that you grew up in for your descendants to read of your childhood experiences.

  • What was the size of your home?
  • Did you have to share your bedroom?
  • Did you play at your homes, or mostly in the streets and playgrounds and fields?
  • Did you have chores around your house?
  • What was the proximity to your neighbors?

http://www.keepingyourmemories.com

A Time I Can’t Remember

2015-12-28

I have been an adult orphan for the past seven years. Yesterday Mom (who passed in January 2009) and Dad (who passed in 2007) were on my heart and in my thoughts while spending a wonderful day celebrating my birthday with my husband, daughter and sons. I especially missed my mom. Even yesterday, with her passing almost seven years ago, I cried and I missed her.

I was mulling over how Mom must have felt the day that she was in labor and gave birth to me. I wish she had recorded in writing when she started having her contractions and the entire experience. Was Dad home to take her to the hospital? What did it feel like at that time to give birth and not have Dad with her during the delivery as was the typical case at that time? How did she feel delivering her fifth child? I would have loved reading today what her dreams for me were that day.

As a mother myself, I can easily envision my thirty-one year old mother holding me, kissing me, and loving me. Being born two days after Christmas Mom always told me that I was the best Christmas present she ever received. They were delighted to have a daughter added to their family of four sons.

I do have pictures (and Dad bought colored film for these pictures) of Mom and Dad holding me when I was an infant fifty-six years ago. And I’m also fortunate to have a copy of our silent 8 mm home movie (converted to a DVD) that my dad taped on Christmas Eve of Mom when she was nine months pregnant with me. She looked young and slim, other than her stomach, and she was admiring the homemade gifts that her sons (ten, eight, six and three years old) had made for her.

With the holiday season we miss our loved ones even more. And I felt it yesterday on my birthday. But I still had a terrific day because I feel my mom is with me wherever I go. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about her. With the cycle of life I also had a new generation, my adult children, to spend time with and enjoy life.

Now is the time to start Keeping Your Memories of the day that your child was born because that is one day that he or she will not remember! Pull out your laptop or grab paper and pen and record in writing the emotional experience you had that day. One day your child and his or her descendants will cherish reading your memories you have on this special day.

  • When did you start having contractions?
  • Did you deliver the infant at home or at a hospital?
  • Who took you to the hospital and what was the story behind the transportation?
  • Share the emotional feelings you felt when you saw your infant for the first time.
  • What prayers or wishes did you have for this newborn child?

 

 

Write a Gift…It’s Priceless!

2015-12-05

Every Christmas I faithfully bake the fruitcake that Mom and Grandma baked. I religiously buy the ribbon candy and mixed nuts that were holiday treats for Mom and Dad. These traditional foods make us feel like Mom and Dad are still with us even though it has already been almost seven and nine years that they have been gone.

I am also fortunate to have the story of her childhood Christmas memories towards the end of the Great Depression that she wrote in 2001 for my son’s classroom project. To this day she feels close to me as I carry on some of these family traditions and read the story she wrote for my son:

“My mother was a great cook and everything always tasted good. When I was a young girl, many years ago, I remember the sight of beautiful deep red cranberries popping and spitting in a tall pan on a wood-burning stove. I can hear the popping of the cranberries as the hot syrup caused the berries to make small explosions that splattered and spit at us as I watched by the stove. I remember you had to jump back quickly. The burn from the cranberry syrup was tiny but intense. My memory of this is vivid to this day.

I liked the colors of Christmas. We went to the Nativity play at the First Baptist Church on the corner of Broad and Rhone in Webb City to see the Nativity play where the birth of Christ was retold. The children dressed in costumes and they used a doll for the Baby Jesus. I remember the pretty blue of Mary’s dress. Afterwards the children got paper sacks filled with colorful Christmas candy, an apple and an orange. This was a real treat. The colors were important for me. This was a time when we were all coming out of the Great Depression. Most of us had little and the items called for worn things and drab colors. You cannot imagine how brown everything was in our homes. At Christmas my world became brighter.

The colors made me feel thankful and there were so many colors to absorb. Christmas would not be Christmas without seeing lights on a fir tree in our house. We did not always have a tree each year because some years Pop couldn’t always afford one. One year when I was ten, my Mom let me have my heart’s desire having all blue lights on our Christmas tree. I think now she must have understood how much I loved the beauty of this holiday. This tree was my favorite. It calmed me and gave me peace. My appreciation and happiness of that moment has never been forgotten.

Christmas brings back memories of ribbon candy, the hard Christmas candy each with its own special flavor, and the candied orange peel my Aunt Jessie always made. She also brought minced meat pie. We were not crazy about the pie because it had real meat in it, but it was part of our Christmas tradition. I remember applesauce cake made from a seventy-five year old recipe. It was always so good. Mama only made her special cake twice a year – at Thanksgiving and Christmas. It had black walnuts in it – ones we gathered off the ground after the first frost in the fall.

I remember the fun of making paper chains, stringing popcorn and singing Christmas carols. We sang the same songs you sing today – “Silent Night,” “Jingle Bells,” and “Deck the Halls.”

The stories, including “Twas the Night Before Christmas,” reading about Santa Claus and his reindeer filled my imagination. I remember laying in bed on Christmas Eve waiting to see him fly through the sky and land on the housetop. I always fell asleep before it happened. I wrote a letter to Santa Claus about my wish list. My brothers and sisters and I would go through Montgomery Ward and Sears catalogs to figure out what we wanted. My list was not so grand. Skates. Dolls. Play dishes. Yet we knew, and without resentment, there might not be any present waiting for us on Christmas morning. It did not matter because I loved the wonder of what might be. It’s like watching a Christmas parade. You’re not a part of it but you still find it enjoyable.”

This Christmas give your family members the priceless gift of sharing your Christmas childhood memories with your children or grandchildren. You can write about your most memorable Christmas and add some of your childhood pictures to your story. One day your descendants will enjoy reading how you and your family celebrated the holidays and will cherish the stories that you left them.

If you are blessed to be with your parents and/or grandparents this holiday season, sit down with them and use the voice memo on your cell phone to record their stories .

Today, grab a paper and pen or open up your laptop and start Keeping Your Memories of your traditions.

  • What Christmas decorations did you put up every year?
  • What did you do on Christmas Eve?
  • What was your Christmas dinner and whom did you share it with?
  • Describe your favorite Christmas present .
  • What did Christmas morning feel like when you were a child?

http://www.keepingyourmemories.com